Yes, you there. Boy who googled “how to ask a girl out for a cup of coffee” in nine different ways.
We want to help you.
Because, honestly? You’re sounding a little desperate.
And my readers, well, we’re girls. Or at least we once were.
So, girls, share your worst pick up experience, best pick up experience or your thoughts on how girls and boys shouldn’t ever speak to each other until they’re 40.
(Anything to help a brother out.)
One random commenter will win a $20 gift card to Starbucks.
(Any excuse to help a sister out to some much-deserved caffeine!)
I’m going out of town for the weekend, so you have til Monday morning to share.
And, Google Boy?
You might want to dial the desperation down just a little.
How many cups of coffee do you think it took me to:
- Wash four loads of laundry
- Put away seven loads of laundry
- Clean two bathrooms and the kitchen
- Vacuum the house
- Help the kids clean their playroom
- Do most of our taxes
- Hem a pair of jeans
I’ll give you a hint…it’s more than the number of weeks that hem will probably hold up!
I would like us all to observe a moment of silence.
I was in a state of denial for a while. I kept asking the kids who had spilled water on the counter, and no one ever fessed up.
But finally, I had to face it.
My coffee brewer had become incontinent.
And now it has gone to the Great Brewing Grounds in the Sky.
Keurig, you have ruined me for any other coffee brewer, and I will miss you desperately.
Until your replacement arrives.
And Audrey has already:
- Eaten four meals
- Splashed in the toilet (twice)
- Pulled Luke’s hair
- Caused me to get out of the shower to get her down off the kitchen table
- Caused me to leave a different part of the bathroom to get her down off the kitchen table
- Made me rescue her from three different chairs she was standing on
- Eaten food from the trash
- Drank my leftover coffee that was sitting on the kitchen table
What do you think she can accomplish now that she’s caffeinated?
Today we went to Starbucks to kill some time during Luke’s gymnastics class.
As I was getting the kids out of the car, a police officer drove up, pointed and me, and said, “Ma’am, do not go in there.”
I thought maybe someone had reported that I was about to violate my self-imposed limit of two cups a day, when he started peeking into the windows.
And then it clicked. A robbery.
It turned out to just be a false alarm, but what does it say about my level of caffeine addiction that I didn’t immediately get back into the car and drive away? Instead I just waited there, hoping it was a prank or false alarm so I could get my fix.
In vacation news, we are back, and I am trying to get the laundry done AGAIN. Why do vacations have to start and end in laundry? If you missed them, you can just scroll down to see just how much I enjoy it, since I’m pretty sure I linked to every post I’ve ever written about laundry last week.
Oh, wait. I missed this one about ironing.
Ok, hopefully I’ll be back tomorrow with some pictures from our vacation!
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