How big is a big family?
Ξ May 1st, 2010 | → 7 Comments | ∇ Everyday Stuff |
Telling people I’m pregnant with my fourth child has been an interesting experience.
There were some people who assumed I’d be done after two children. After all, I had one boy and one girl, so there was no reason to have any more, right?
But when I said we wanted a third, people weren’t too surprised. Apparently three children is still within the realm of a normal-sized family to them.
But lately I’ve had strangers ask me, “Is that your first or second?”
And when I answer fourth, I get disbelieving shock followed by, “Oh. Well, I guess if that’s how many you want…” or “Wow. I guess if you like big families…” both uttered in a doubtful tone that tells me what they’re really thinking is something more along the lines of, “Woman, what the heck are you thinking having that many kids?”
Is there really that big of a divide between having three and four kids? Does three seem normal but four seem like a big scary family to you?
on May 1st, 2010 at 10:46 am
I’m laughing Christy – because at the moment I am having fleeting panic attacks about #2!!! I think there does seem to be a big jump between 3 and 4 when you’re looking from the outside in. I have friends with 3 and friends with 4 and somehow 4 just seems like a lot of kids! But that being said – all my friends with 4 also seem super happy with their family size and I think it’s a really nice balance for them (moreso than 3 was for many of them). Must be frustrating though to get those looks and doubtful comments!
Maybe they’re all just jealous because they know they aren’t “parent” enough to handle 4 kiddos
on May 2nd, 2010 at 2:03 am
That’s so funny. It’s totally true though. I’ve had people get in my face and speak very clearly (and meanly) that I should NOT have another. It’s also especially amusing when they start to talk about so-and-so with 8, 10, 12 kids when you come around with your 4. I still don’t get how 4 relates to 8. That’s a huge difference!
on May 3rd, 2010 at 5:52 am
So very, very true! Our youngest is 3 and we still get looks and questions when we’re out with all four of ours.
on May 9th, 2010 at 10:04 am
That’s funny, I don’t think of 4 of big. When i think of big i think 20 LOL.
on May 15th, 2010 at 12:30 pm
No, four is not big! I think it’s just the human tendency to not easily process what’s out of our realm of experience… so if someone has experienced 1 or 2 kids, it’s hard to imagine more unless they’ve seen other larger families and admired them. Just my two cents
on June 2nd, 2010 at 2:35 pm
Congratulations!
I have four children! Here in the midwest, having less than three is unusual.
Just tell people that you’d rather have your hands full than empty.
on June 29th, 2010 at 5:15 pm
Congratulations!!! What a blessing! I just had my sixth and my oldest is going to be 21 in November! People always ask if I’m nuts or if I’m Mormon…I am neither! I love having a large family!