The Cone of Uncertainty
*cue creepy movie music*
dunh dunh DUNH
Really, can the weather forecasters get any more melodramatic?
What’s next?
The Path of Disaster? The Faultline of Fatality?
Come on, let me hear some more!
Gustav just really needs to make up his mind about what he’s gonna be and where he’s gonna go.
We didn’t move to Mississippi until two years after Katrina hit, so I don’t have that experience to look back on, but so many of my friends here do. It was three years ago this week, and the strain of it is really showing here in the Gulf Coast. The gas stations and grocery stores are just crazy, and a sense of tension seems to hang over everyone.
Isaac is scheduled to go to Texas for some training on Tuesday, the same day Gustav is currently expected to make landfall, so we’re trying to figure out our evacuation plans. His class is mandatory, so we’re thinking about making a vacation out of his trip. We might just board up the house, empty out the fridge, load up the kids, all of our important paperwork, our computers and back-up drives, our high-value items, my scrapbooks, and our favorite clothes and head to Texas.
Just your average spur-of-the-moment road trip, right?
It makes me realize how much I prefer earthquakes. I mean, you stock up on emergency supplies, but there aren’t days of agonizing and checking the forecasts wondering where it will be and how strong. It just suddenly rocks your world and you stand in a doorway for 15 seconds or so, then you swap predictions on how strong you think it was. 5.3? 4.9? And everything is back to normal.
What do you prefer? What just freaks you out? I can live the rest of my life without ever experiencing a tornado, thankyouverymuch.
So I’m putting on my mascara, and just when i’ve got a nice layer on every lash, but it’s not quite dry, BAM!
Or should I say, ACHOO!
I get hit with one of those full-bodied sneezes. You know that kind that cause you to involuntarily squeeze your eyes tightly closed to keep your eyeballs from popping out of your head?
And then when it passes and I open my eyes?
A perfect outline of my lashes now resides underneath my eyes, causing me to look like a football player with black paint under my eyes.
I hope I’m not the only one this happens to, as it actually happens to me on an alarmingly regular basis.
The trouble is that I lose my vision.
My creative vision.
See, when I am blogging regularly, I’m probably also scrapbooking and taking pictures regularly.
So when I go in to Luke’s room and see that he’s fallen asleep right by the window and the light is coming in just right, I can grab my camera, and take a picture perfect for Wordless Wednesday and a scrap page with pictures of him sleeping in different positions.
But then I never edit the picture in Photoshop and never post it, and it just sits there on my desktop, sleepy and lonely, a digital sleeping beauty forever waiting for someone to wake him up.
And then I’m doing dishes and trying to scrape dried up Cheerios off the table and ground and I think about how maybe I’ll write a post about the glue-like properties of Cheerios and their potential as an alternative to cement, but I just can’t think of a funny way to write it.
And then Luke pees in the toilet, except he somehow misses the toilet and pees on the wall two feet to the left of it, forever ruining the brown-paper bag wall treatment that the previous owners created, and I realize that I’ve completely lost my sense of humor, and cannot find anything remotely funny in my urine-bleached wall.
And that my creativity is as dead as my camera battery.
But I have a kitchen full of dishes to wash, so I don’t really have time to go searching for my lost creativity.
How are ya’ll? Should I be looking for guest posters to keep my blog alive over the next few weeks?
