Isaac (Part 20)
Ξ February 14th, 2008 | → 6 Comments | ∇ me me me |
I can remember the night that I packed up all of the letters and pictures that represented my relationship with Isaac and put them into a box. I couldn’t bring myself to throw them away, but I knew I needed to try to get over him; to accept that my life was not going in the direction I thought it was, and I was not going to marry the man I thought I was going to.
When Isaac asked me to get back together with him, I had shocked myself by saying no. I had already had one fickle boyfriend, who broke up with me and got back together on a whim, and I wasn’t about to let that happen again.
After turning Isaac down, I went home and finally threw that shoebox in the trash.
And then got it out again two hours later.
As the school year started, I found Isaac in my life more and more. We saw each other at church. He’d make sure to talk to me for a few minutes at lunch after church. I went to a weekly meeting at USC where my college pastor, and basically my boss, was, and I’d see him there. I was fully involved in Orange County, 50 miles away from Isaac, with a group of 12 girls in the new Christian Challenge Bible study I’d started, yet Isaac still managed to be around, helping out and making himself useful.
One weekend I took three girls to a conference that many of the Christian Challenge and BSU groups were at.
My next door neighbor?
Isaac.
We ended up sitting outside our doors and talking for hours. I don’t even remember about what, but I know that by the end of the weekend I knew that I’d never fallen out of love with him, he’d never fallen out of love with me, and he had just been trying to be obedient to what he thought God was doing in our lives when we broke up.
We both also saw that while it would be difficult to be living 50 miles away from each other, it was possible to still spend time together without sacrificing the separate ministries we were involved in.
And we both knew that no one else out there held any interest for us.
We still weren’t in any position to get married. I was raising support in my job as a director for Christian Challenge and had just started a Masters program, and he was still in college and had no income. We were careful with our time, and soon the year was over and Isaac graduated and was heading from California to Rhode Island for Surface Warfare Officer School. He was there for five months before being stationed in San Diego on a ship.
Isaac returned to California and…didn’t propose. Months went by of commutes between Orange County and San Diego, and weekends where we wanted to see each other but couldn’t because one of us had obligations. My heart was becoming more and more torn, and I finally had some sympathy for Isaac’s decision to break up with me two years before.
A heart can’t be in two places at once.
I was down to only about 9 months left in my program, and would soon have to decide if I was going to continue on as Campus Director, and realized that something had to change. And since I didn’t believe I should be the one to propose or to push for a proposal, I began to prepare myself to break up with Isaac so that I could be fully committed in one place.
But then something was different. Isaac had this…look. And I started tormenting my roommate, knowing that if Isaac was going to propose, she would know.
on February 14th, 2008 at 1:12 pm
It’s a good thing that I already know that you two end up together in the end… Otherwise your cliffhanger endings would kill me! You should apply as a writer for LOST!
on February 14th, 2008 at 1:15 pm
oh no, another love story that i have to anxiously wait for each new chapter! oh well, it will be fun to catch up and learn more. b/t you and pioneer woman, who needs harlequin!
on February 14th, 2008 at 9:20 pm
This is far better than a trashy romance novel!! And quite the page turner too! I know all about the long distance part…and the challenges of a man in the military. My solution was to join him…in the military that is. I can’t wait to hear what yours was!
on February 14th, 2008 at 10:25 pm
Yeah! The romance continues and on Valentines Day! Great to hear the story again!
on February 15th, 2008 at 5:42 pm
I remember the torment…I break way too easy!
on February 15th, 2008 at 7:55 pm
Ok, so I’m new here, and I read this and was like – huh? Am I supposed to click somewhere? Where’d she go?
A cliffhanger. Cle-ver.